Evaluations for my Research Project

Student Evaluation #1:

1) The lead in is wonderful. It perfectly sets the stage and draws the reader in!

2) The thesis focuses on the media's influence on black women's view of themselves. The thesis is very focused and supported well.

3) The writer used portions of The Bluest Eye and extrapolated on them very appropriately. Outside research is used well.

4) The conclusion was not focused on the main point. Use the conclusion to wrap up the main idea of the project.

5) Yes, the close reading is very good.

6) The beginning of the paper was the strongest section. It really drew me in.

7) The conclusion was the weakest. Again, just tighten it up a bit.

8) I thought that project was very well done. The lack of color in the first portion helped set the mood. The project drives home it's point very well. Good job, well done!! :)

9) Michael G.

Student Evaluation #2:

1) The writer begins with a letter from Pecola Breedlove. Yes, it does work. This letter is written by the author. It grabs the reader's attention.

2) The main focus if the pressure of the media on the black women. The main idea is focused. It got a little more confusing by the end. I felt some of the pieces were just added in - the reader needed some more clarification.

3) The writer does not use pages from the book. She makes up her own story past the ending of the book - it does work for the paper though. There is no other research added into the text.

4) The paper concludes with the author explaining each piece added into the paper. This ties up all the loose ends.

5) The author does not have much support from the text added into the paper. The author does explain how Pecola really wants blue eyes

6) The strongest section of the paper is the beginning few papers. These papers the author made herself. This idea is very original. This interested the reader and got the reader's attention.

7) The weakest section was towards the end of the paper. The readers got a little confused with the importance of pieces included. Why did the author include this?

8) Overall, you was very original idea to cover! I really enjoyed your letter from Pecola and the letter from Claudia. The interview was written very well. This made your paper enjoying to read. To strengthen you paper, I would put notes from the author on each paper - myself as a reader got lost in you paper. I kept asking myself, "why is this included?' By putting notes of importance, you will be able to keep your reader's attention. Some more outside research needs to be added into the paper. For an example, how people go crazy from trying to someone else. Try to tie your theis - influence of media on African Americans - more into the paper. I felt the paper was written in three parts - Pecola's craziness - black women in society - songs, poems. Try to tie all 3 of these elements together. Overall, this paper is very creative. Nice job!! :)

9) Kimberly

Self - Evaluation:

From Kimberly's remarks, I do feel that my letter was the strongest part of my project. I did indeed have a difficult time trying to incorporate probably too many different, creative ideas. I do like her idea in incorportating some author notes within the actual page. All in all, I've learned that it' probably better to stick to the more traditional research paper format. But we'll see what Michael has to say.

Michael basically states the same idea: my concluding thoughts really don't tie in with the main point of my paper. Thus, instead of just doing notes, I may try a "concluding paper" not sure what that exactly means yet, but I'll have a better ending for sure!